


Pint Sized Psyche

by weirdqafan



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Reference to Daryl's childhood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 09:02:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10159493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weirdqafan/pseuds/weirdqafan
Summary: Everyone goes to Judith





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Tara & Judith’s scene in 7x12 "Say Yes"

Definition of psy•che [sahy-kee] _noun_

1\. soul, spirit, or personality

2\. the totality of the human mind, conscious and unconscious

 

Judith was an essential part of the group. And not just in a “protect the next generation” or “light in the darkness” sort of way. This was what most people outside of the family failed to realize.

She kept everyone sane. She kept everyone’s secrets. She kept them who they are.

Everyone in the family always vied to be able to spend time with Judith. Whether it was babysitting or spending a few minutes sitting on the porch alone, where no one could overhear them, private time with Judith was something to be cherished.

 ~*~

Judith was the only one that Daryl told about his time in the Sanctuary. Not the details, because Daryl couldn’t actually remember specific details much beyond the cold, shame, hunger and pain. He told Judith of this. He also explained how being there had reduced him to an 8 year old child again, hiding from the monsters in the shadows, monsters whose fists connected with his face at every turn, monsters who lashed at his back when he least expected and monsters who put their cigarettes out on his skin. He almost forgot who he had become. He would never have been a Savior, but he was close to forgetting who “Daryl” was. When he finished speaking, Judith crawled into his lap, added her hands to his wiping the tears from his face and wrapped her little pudgy arms around his neck. It was the first time since the Sanctuary that Daryl felt truly safe and himself again.

~*~

Rick confided in his daughter whenever he felt like he could no longer be the leader everyone needed him to be. Those doubts arose more often than anyone, even Michonne, could ever guess. Surviving was hard enough, but having to lead and be responsible for so many people, for their safety and survival, was unbearable. Rick told her how sometimes he wished that he had never woken up from his coma, which of course was followed immediately by immense guilt. He could never‐ NEVER tell anyone else. When Rick was feeling at his lowest, most desolate, his Judith would give him her sweet little smile and lay her head on his chest over his heart. He drew strength from her. She gave him the strength to go on for one more day, one more week, one more month.

~*~

Most people thought that Carol snuck out of Alexandria without telling anyone what she was planning. Most people were wrong. Carol told Judith. She explained how she was losing herself. How she didn’t recognize the person in the mirror any more. How while she loved and would do anything for their family, that the thought of having to take any one else’s life made bile rise into her throat. How the thought of touching Judith with hands that seemed permanently stained with blood made her weep. How she had become the protector that Sophia needed her to be, too late to protect her own daughter. When Carol said goodbye to her, Judith looked at her solemnly with those big eyes that saw everything and handed Carol one of her favorite toys, a small stuffed bear holding a heart. A reminder of what she was doing, why she was doing it and what she was leaving behind.

~*~

Rosita was angry. That was obvious. She didn’t spend a lot of time with anyone anymore, mostly isolating herself and thinking up new and improved ways to kill Negan. But she wasn’t willing to give up her time with Judith. When she sought out her quality Judy time was the only time the anger that surrounded her like armor seemed to abate. She told Judith how she hated Negan. And she did.

But she admitted to Judith just how angry she was at Abraham. He used her, told her he was only with her because he thought there were no other women left, cheated on her and then died on her. She was so angry at him, but you aren’t supposed to be angry at a dead guy. There was no outlet for the rage that just seemed to boil within her until it spilled out over everywhere, at everyone else. She didn’t know what to do. She felt lost in a sea of anger and knew that if she didn’t find a way out, she would drown. Judith ate an apple while she watched Rosita talk, with her eyebrows pursed, a little line forming between them, before placing her sticky hand over Rosita’s clenched fist. Rosita opened and enveloped Judith’s hand in hers. When Judith offered her a piece of apple Rosita gratefully accepted.

~*~

Glenn was actually the first to go to Judith. At the time she had still been an infant, but Glenn had sought out some alone time with the baby. It was during their time at the prison and Glenn was trying to decide if he should propose to Maggie or not. Part of him thought it was a great idea, a symbol of his promise to always be by her side. The other part of him was scared shitless, that in a world where the dead walked and they never knew if they would survive to next week, she would think it ridiculous. He discussed the pros and cons, while holding Judith and pacing a cell. She watched him closely, seemingly entranced by his anxiety over what she probably thought was a no-brainer. By the time he finished, Judith had not cried, spit up, fussed or pooped once. With her official stamp of approval, Glenn proposed the next day.

~*~

Paul Rovia was the newest member of the family. While some still refused to acknowledge him as such due to stubbornness, he was definitely part of the inner circle. Family. The word still rang in Paul’s head as if he had never heard it before. It had been so long, that being part of a family seemed like a foreign concept. He spent so much time hiding behind his “Jesus” facade, that Paul didn’t know how to act or who to be. Especially around this group of people. Though they couldn’t see it, good as he was at hiding, he was scared. Scared to show them Paul. “Jesus” they accepted. He didn’t know if they would like Paul.

The first time Paul babysat Judith was during a war planning session in Alexandria when no one else was available. With a trusting nod from Rick and a threatening glare from Daryl, Paul was left alone with a toddler for the first time since long before the turn. Before Paul could meltdown in a panic, no ninja moves being able to save him here, Judith took the lead, sitting in the living room and arranging her plush toys and dolls around her blocks. When she waved a plastic cup invitingly, Paul sat with her.

While the Great Siege of the Block Tower was taking place, Paul told Judith why her family made him so nervous. He didn’t understand them. Paul prided himself on being able to understand people, it’s how he had survived so long. He didn’t understand how her family could welcome him after his actions lead to the brutal deaths of so many of their family members. He told her how they shouldn’t be welcoming him, they should be blaming him. Paul blamed himself, so why shouldn’t they? Everyday Paul blamed himself for getting the Alexandrians involved with the Saviors, for causing the brutal deaths and pain of so many of their own. They should hate him, like he hated himself.

By the time he had finished, the emotions that he normally kept tightly bound beneath his “Jesus” guise, had tumbled out unchecked. Judith looked at him with a pout on her lips, used his shoulder to pull herself up and kicked over her carefully constructed tower. As Paul sat stunned at the sudden destruction, Judith grabbed a handful of his hair and gave him the tiniest of kisses on his nose. He sat in stunned awe at that simple sign of affection. Warmth bloomed in his chest. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt something so pure. That was the day Paul started to let go of his guilt and look to the future. He knew he would do everything he could to protect the rest of Judith’s‐THEIR‐ family.

~*~

Carl spent the most time with Judith out of anyone. That made sense: he was her big brother. It was his job to protect her, to look out for her, to teach her. What people didn’t realize is that most of the time, their main topic of conversation was one subject‐ their mom. Carl told Judith everything he could about their mom. What color her hair was, what she smelled like, what her favorite song was. How she was a horrible cook, but an incredible baker.

Carl also told Judith other things. Like how every day, he was forgetting more and more what their mom looked like. Just how close he was to forgetting what she sounded like. If he looked at Judith with his eye squinted, in just the right light he could see their mom, but it was getting harder and harder. He told her these things about Lori so that she would know about her mom, but also as a reminder to himself. Each time he would go to tell Judith something about their mom and the tidbit of information would be gone, lost in the ether, he would choke up and clutch Judith close. Judith would turn towards him, pat his forehead and make a toddler’s attempt at humming. Carl knew that even though he couldn’t remember everything about their mom, he was holding the most important piece of her left, in his arms.

End.


End file.
